


Familiar like an Old Comforting Jacket

by BasicallySnakespere



Series: Faded, Worn, Familiar [3]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, But they're mentioned, Hurt/Comfort, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Part 3, dont worry though, its a happy ending, mention of drugs, there aren't any, touch starved Janus
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-12
Updated: 2021-01-12
Packaged: 2021-03-17 04:02:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,118
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28718532
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BasicallySnakespere/pseuds/BasicallySnakespere
Summary: part 3 of Faded Worn Familiar.Janus wakes up.
Series: Faded, Worn, Familiar [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2098986
Comments: 4
Kudos: 40





	Familiar like an Old Comforting Jacket

He blinked open his eyes, the too-bright room making his head hurt, and he screwed his eyes shut.

The lights dimmed, and he cautiously opened his eyes back up. His vision blurred, but slowly focused, and now he could see Patton, watching him with an expression more Logan then Patton.

“Hey Janus, how do you feel?”

He tried to respond but found that he couldn’t, his mouth was too dry, his throat parched. He coughed dryly a few times, and Patton poured him a glass of water, handing it to Janus. He sniffed it a couple of times to be safe, the poisoned water gave off a smell not unlike burning metal. Upon finding it apparently safe, he greedily drank the water.

It was wonderful, like rain on a summer evening, it brought pure, instant relief. He finished the glass and longed for more. He held out the glass, and Patton obligingly poured him another. The water was heavenly, and Janus relished every drop.

His thirst quenched for the moment, he allowed himself a moment for his brain to catch up, taking stock of the situation.

The numbing cold was gone. In fact, he felt warm, a sensation he’d sorely missed, and one he loved. His head was throbbing his a slight headache, (a side effect of dehydration) and while he was by no means back to full strength, he no longer felt in danger of fading now that his system wasn’t being forcibly shut down by the cold.

A quick glance around told him he was in Patton’s room, which explained why Patton was in here, looking at him expectantly. Right, he had been asked a question.

He cleared his throat before speaking, his voice coming out hoarse from disuse. How long had he been out? “I’m  _ fine _ Patton, why am I in your room?”

Patton frowned, his brow creasing in concern. “Janus, we found you unconscious in your room. You were almost dead, Remus was panicking. Do you really expect me to believe you’re alright?”

“No, but it was worth a try,” he said bluntly. “I don’t need your help, and you don’t need to burden yourself with my company any longer.”

Patton’s frown deepened, and the expression looked out of place of the normally cheerful and bubbly side. “Janus, this can’t continue. You know you can turn to us for help, right?”

“Can I?” He pushed himself up, meeting Patton’s gaze. “Do you really think I’d be welcomed by anyone besides yourself? After all, you’re only doing it out of misplaced pity or guilt, and I doubt the others share your sentiment. Roman still sees me as the villain, and Virgil hates every bone in my body. Logan might’ve been the only one to tolerate me, but then I impersonated him twice. In what world would I be welcomed? You’re the only one who would be sad to see me go, and even then I doubt you’d stew over it long before moving on.”

He closed his eyes, exhausted by his outburst. He didn’t even want to try to decipher Patton’s expression.

“You’re wrong.”

His eyes snapped back open at Virgil’s voice. He stood in the doorway, meeting Janus’s gaze with something stirring in his eyes.

“I-” he hesitated a moment, “I don’t hate you Janus.” to his surprise, he didn’t taste a lie, only the bitter truth. “I don’t fully trust you, and you piss me off and make me anxious, but I don’t hate you, I never have.” He stepped in, and Logan and Roman entered behind him.

“Even if I did hold contempt for you, which is a falsehood, I still wouldn’t deny you basic aid.” Logan adjusted his tie, a nervous tic Janus made note of. “You are a necessary part of Thomas, and you require and deserve comfort and safety just as much as any of us.” Janus blinked and leaned back, a little overwhelmed.

Roman stepped forward, nervously wringing his hands. “I,” he sighed, looking away from Janus. “I don’t know how I feel about you, I don’t even know how I’m  _ supposed _ to feel about you, but I do know I’m part of why you feel so unwelcome. I haven’t behaved very honorably, and,” he took a deep breath, bringing his gaze up to meet Janus’s eyes. “I’m sorry Janus, that you felt like you had to go through that alone, and that I made you feel like you couldn’t seek out aid from us.”

Janus looked back and forth between them, stunned. This couldn’t be real. Had he inhaled one of Remus’s hallucinogens again? That made more sense than this actually happening.

“You, you, I” he scrambled for a response, his thoughts in shambles. He started breathing faster, on the verge of hyperventilating, tears pricking in the back of his human eye.

He felt a hand rubbing his back, and he flinched away, curling in on himself.

“No non no, this can’t be happening, you’re all lying, how can I believe a word you’re saying when everything you’ve done goes against it?”

He didn’t feel Patton sit down next to him on the bed, but he did feel the arms wrap around him in a tight, reassuring hug. Then he felt Virgil’s and he felt the warmth of his hoodies. He felt Roman and Logan join them, and he broke. He started sobbing, feeling truly warm for the first time in years. When was the last time he’d been hugged? Why was it coming from people who hated him?

“I’m so sorry Janus.” Patton was the first to speak once Janus’s sobs had slowed down to a few sniffles. “We should’ve made you feel more welcome. You’re important, and you matter, to me and to Thomas.” The others murmured their agreement, and Patton continued, “We can talk about all that later, once you’re better. For now, you can relax, and we’ll take care of you.” Janus was too weak and tired to argue. (And if it meant he didn’t have to leave the wonderfully warm hug? He didn’t really mind all that much.)

There would be talks later, and many more apologies, from everyone. But right now? Janus just closed his eyes and savored this feeling, one of comfort and warmth. He felt the familiar tug of sleep creeping up on him, but this time he knew he’d wake again. This time, he wouldn’t be alone.

The others finding him hadn’t turned out so bad after all, he mused as he slipped asleep, heald by people who were once his family, people who could maybe, just maybe, could be his family again.

For now, he was safe. He wasn’t alone anymore.

And that was a wonderful thing.

**Author's Note:**

> here we are, this is the first multi-part work I've ever finished, and while it isn't much, I'm very proud of it, and I'm glad I got to write this. Thank you to everyone who commented, it gave me the motivation to follow this all the way through
> 
> fun fact, the whole reason I wrote this was because I wanted to describe what its like drinking water when you wake up in the middle of the night. and this is what I ended up with.


End file.
